This is an list of sentences actually spoken in my house the past couple days. You do not need the entire conversation or text to get the jest of the importance of thinking before speaking.
"Mom! Mom! The bus is coming! Quick give me your car keys!!!"
(umm- huh? you are years away from drivers ed there bucko)
"I'm sooo glad when we had this house built, we had them put the hand rail for the stairs on the right side, as my right side is my strongest."
(think munkay girl, are you planning on backing down the stairs to use your right side?)
"I love you more than I should".
(when did the quota go into effect?)
"Mom, are you gonna finish that?"
(darn straight- watch your back, yours is next)
"Your dog asked ME to dance."
(see previous "secret life of betty post")
"The only thing I like more for breakfast than pork is bacon, or ham."
(hello?)
"I need a picture of Rush Limbaugh".
(when did I have my lobotomy?)
"G&# D!#$ M&^%$* F^*#%@# door!!!!!"
(this said to my jeep tail door after hitting my head loading flowers into it across the street of the church in front of Sis Heidi"s flower store-as if it ever touched my mum)
"Shit! I'm late for church"
(when caught yelling unrelated obscenities at my car door by innocent passer-by)
"You want me to use new or used rock for your retaining wall?"
(how new is new in rock years? 1 million years? 2 million?)
"Am I wearing your pants?"
"You are so much nicer than my west coast wife."
(grrr not anymore baby)
"If a slug and a leach were in a contest, would the winner let me stay up later than 9:00 p.m.?"
(no- tell that to any slimy crawly things that inquire)
"I'm gonna vote for Bush just because I think Kerry is a cadaver"
(well he does look and act the part)
"Can I have a cell phone so I can call you from the bathroom?"
(sneaking cell calls from school bathrooms is now edgier than smoking)
"Why can't a girl have two husbands?"
(after gripping about men in general)
"Can I have another piece of gravy?"
(C'mon, it's not THAT lumpy)
Yes, the conversations held in this house are varied and interesting. Think twice and speak once would be a good rule to put into effect.
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
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2 comments:
As long as you didn't use all those sentinces in the same conversation all seems deep to me. I just want to know more about the mystery pants. Shelly who fell here by accident.
Shelly- you tell me were these size 27 inch waist cargo jeans came from. They are totally cool tho and we all want to wear them now.
Riv- thats just gotta make the conversations inside your head all the more intresting.Rock says "Hey" from my fridge door, when he is not being kissed thank you.
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